This is Why Your Other Weight Loss Programs Didn’t Work

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Wanna know why your last weight loss program didn’t work? The short answer is this: they were only trying to change your body. But my friend, weight loss only finishes in your body. It starts in your brain. So, if you want to ditch the programs that don’t work, and lose weight for the last time, you gotta know what’s been missing from those other plans. Which is exactly what we’re talking about today.

Weight loss feels like such a “body thing,” and you’ve heard your whole life that it’s all about calories in and calories out, so if you want to lose one pound, you’ve gotta burn 3500 calories. But how come it’s never that easy in real life?

Because sustainable, permanent weight loss isn’t just about your body.

Your brain and your body are always working together, which means that your weight loss program needs to work with them both.

Helpful Timestamps:
00:00 The podcast discusses why other weight loss programs failed.
06:30 Negative thoughts and doubts affecting weight loss.
10:10 Many programs didn’t work due to unsustainable habits and food preferences.
13:05 Create belief in weight loss through intentional decisions and data collection, leading to sustainable habits and self-belief.
14:36 Creating belief for yourself is key to weight loss success with the Five O Method. Understanding past failures is essential for making it work.
18:55 Address disbeliefs, sustainable habits, intentional belief, daily journaling, portion control, mindset shift.


You wanna know why your last weight loss program or even your last 10 weight loss programs didn't work? The short answer is this. They were only trying to change your body by doing body things like eating and exercising and maybe drinking water. But my friend, weight loss only finishes in your body. It starts in your brain. So if you wanna ditch the programs that don't work and lose weight for the last time, you gotta know what's been missing from those other plans, which is exactly what we're talking about today. Listen. Anybody can help you lose weight after menopause by restricting yourself and using willpower, but my zone of genius is helping you lose all The weight you want and keep it on forever by changing your mindset. Welcome to the Get Your Goal podcast where ambitious menopausal women come to lose weight for the last time. I'm your host, Paula b, certified life and weight loss coach, author of mind over menopause, and former Yo Yo Dieter. When you're ready to change your mind about weight loss, I'm here to help. Let's get your goal. Okay. So before we even dive in, yes. As a matter of fact, I am sick. I know you can hear it in my voice. And so let me tell you right now, if you are sensitive to raspy voices or stuffy noses, you can totally just go read the transcript on my website instead of suffering through the audio today. The website is get your goal .com. Right at the top, there's a menu item that says podcast. When you go to that page, if you are listening to this in real time, it should be the most recent one. If you are listening to this at some point in time in the future, it's the one titled, this is why your other weight loss programs didn't work. Feel free to simply read Instead of sitting here with me in my minivan with a box of Kleenex and a brand new thing of hand sanitizer a voice that is probably going to crack like a teenage boy's. Oh my gosh. You guys, I have been sick all week, but today was podcast recording day. And, frankly, I sound a lot better than I have the last several days. So I was like, oh, this is gonna be no big deal. And yet, I have already started and stopped this recording, I think, 4 or maybe even 5 times at this point. And I'm just I'm gonna take a nice, not too deep of a breath because that'll stop start me coughing again, but I'm gonna take a nice little breath, And we're gonna talk a nice calm manner about why your other weight loss programs didn't work. This is such an important topic, and I'm really excited to talk to you about this today. I really firmly believe that part of part of getting your goal, part of getting where you wanna go is understanding what doesn't work as well as understanding what does. And so I wanna talk to you today about the things that you've been through, the experiences that you've had with other weight loss programs so that you can really start to see well, first of all, that it's not just you, that it's all of us, and that it's not even necessarily just a program. Like, it is not my intention today to, like, throw all other weight loss programs under the bus and be like, nothing really works. But rather to explain to you why they didn't work for you. Here's the facts. Weight loss is always always driven by 3 things in this exact order. Number 1 is believing that you can. Number 2 is eating in a slight caloric deficit over time, and then number 3 is lovingly supporting your metabolism while you do so. Now here's the thing. 99.99% of weight loss programs really only address the body part. They really truly treat weight loss like it's just this calories in, calories out. You create this deficit of 3500 calories over the course of a week and boom, you've lost a pound, like like, as though your body works in some kind of a vacuum. And, yes, that is, technically speaking, how your body works, but, also, in a very real sense, It's not. Your body doesn't do anything without your brain telling it what to do. Really, truly tackling the belief piece is the thing that Well, first of all, the other programs are missing, and the thing that you really need to take care of, I'm gonna say first. And in fact, that really is what we're discussing today is the belief piece. Again, I feel like there's plenty of information in the world about how your body works in isolation as though it's a vacuum, and this is exactly how it works every single time. And It may not be as readily available, but I do think that there are lots of programs that at least touch on supporting your metabolism, you know, gently and lovingly while you're losing weight. There are plenty of, like, sources of information that really talk about drinking your water and resting and recovering. So what we're really talking about today is why the belief piece is so important and really specifically what's missing about belief in other weight loss programs. So I find that there are 3 really important places that other programs are missing this kind of belief work. Number 1 is that other programs don't usually address your disbelief. Number 2 is that most programs are asking you to try and create habits that aren't sustainable over time. And then number 3, other programs aren't helping you create belief on purpose. So let's dig into each of these a little bit further because problem number 1 is that your program other programs didn't address your disbeliefs. And trust me, you have them. Here's the thing about disbelief. It's not just one thing. It's not Like, 1 sentence in your brain that says, I don't really believe I can lose weight. Like, yeah, you're probably thinking that too, but also it's lots of thoughts that you have over the course of your day. It's all of the negative self talk. It's all of the monkey chatter. It's all of the little thoughts that are running around in the background that most of us aren't paying attention to. It's stuff like the whisper in your ear after you finish with a workout that says, well, that wasn't enough. Or It's that thing that you hear right before you go to bed that when you're tallying up your calories for the day that says, well, you're never gonna get there, so why should you even bother? It's the monkey chatter that ruins your entire day after you step on the scale or the endless loop of stress that has you reaching for a snack that you didn't intend to, or it's that little voice at the end of a long, hard day that says, oh, You deserve a treat. You don't have to count these calories. All of those are what I'm grouping into this umbrella of disbelief. What I mean is that you're having unhelpful thoughts that are taking you away from your weight loss goal instead of towards it. Thinking about these thoughts as disbeliefs can actually be really helpful for you in the long run. Even though the thoughts themselves aren't helpful. They're not taking you towards your weight loss goal. Really looking at them as disbeliefs can help you and what I'm saying when I'm talking about how important the belief piece is. Every single sentence in your brain that isn't taking you towards your weight loss goal is taking you away from it. And most programs Most programs might address, like, on the surface, like, oh, you have negative self talk. You have monkey chatter in your brain. And that's okay because you can find the silver lining. You can push it to the side. You can definitely still get where you wanna go. Here are some happy affirmations. It's all gonna work out for you in the end. That is not what I'm talking about when I'm saying address your disbelief. I am never going to tell you to just think positive thoughts. I am never going to advocate for you stuffing down or pushing aside or looking for the silver lining. What I'm talking about here, addressing your disbeliefs, is like literally pulling them out, picking up the rock, looking at the bugs underneath, shining a light in the dark cave, looking those yucky sentences in the eyeballs so that you can see them for what they are. They're thoughts in your brain that are stopping you from getting where you want to go. And no amount of shoving them down or pushing them aside or trying to find the silver lining or chanting happy little thoughts to yourself will make those go away. You need to actually address the disbeliefs. Look at them clearly, plainly, compassionately, fortunately, kindly. I mean, don't get me wrong here. I'm not saying that you have to shove your nose in them. I'm saying that you have to stop ignoring them. You have to actually take a look at what's going on inside your brain that is disbelief. Now problem number 2 is that other programs probably and this is not a blanket statement about every single program that ever existed ever. But most of the well, all of the programs I've been on how about that? All of the programs that I've been on that didn't work for me had me trying to create habits that weren't sustainable over time. Over the course of my 40 plus years of yo yo dieting, I have been on a lot of different programs. And most of them had me trying to eat foods that I do not like. I'm an incredibly picky eater. Just FYI. This one might only apply to me, but had me eating foods I don't like or had me trying to, like, change change my schedule around in a way that just didn't make sense for me and my lifestyle or had me eating in quantities that Basically had me wanting to eat my own arm by the end of the day. Most programs are asking you to do something short term for the allegedly long term benefit of having lost the weight. But here's the thing. You're never actually creating habits when all you're doing is using willpower. You know how I mean, I'm sure you've heard the same thing that I have. Like, it takes 28 days to create a habit. And that is, like, the mantra of people who are just absolutely white knuckling and using willpower to try to get to the end of the month. But If that is how you are trying to create a habit, let me gently and kindly disabuse you of that notion right now. You will never create a long term sustainable habit unless you have some version of pleasure. You need to like what you're doing in order to keep doing it. And weight loss, no matter how much or how little you have to lose, is a long term sustainable project. It is not something that you can do even I mean, truly, even if you're only trying to lose a couple of pounds. Losing it by doing something through willpower won't have you keeping the weight off. You really are creating new habits. And the truth of it is that if you are doing something that is not sustainable over time, this is why your weight loss program didn't work. Now problem number 3 is actually kind of a byproduct of problem number 1 and problem number 2. It's it's really that you you didn't have the ability to create belief in yourself and your weight loss because you weren't really looking at the disbeliefs and you weren't really working on habits that you could use over the long term. So it's kinda like it's kinda like you're rowing a boat that's taking on water without acknowledging the hole in the boat while also telling yourself to just row harder. It's like, yeah, you're probably gonna sink if you're trying to do that. Creating belief in yourself and your weight loss isn't something that magically happens to you. It doesn't come on you simply by losing weight or by following a program or by doing weight loss things for your body. You actually intentionally create belief in yourself like, well, like a skill. I mean, it's it's intentionally making decisions that feel loving to yourself instead of trying to white knuckle your way through. It's intentionally collecting data like a scientist Instead of just, like, hoping and wishing for results, it's intentionally looking for your wins Instead of constantly listening to and living inside of all of your disbeliefs, In much the same way that that your other weight loss programs didn't work as a byproduct of the first two problems, a weight loss program that does work it is a byproduct of addressing those first two problems. When you are really, truly taking a look at your disbeliefs and really, truly creating habits for yourself that are sustainable over the long term, you almost can't help but create belief in yourself. And the reason I say almost is because because you actually can. You can do those things and still not create belief for yourself. Creating belief for yourself is an intentional act. And once you know that well, first of all, it can help you recognize what was missing from other weight loss programs that didn't work and really take a look at how to make your new weight loss program, the five o method, actually work. Okay. So let's put all those pieces together, and let me explain to you why the Five O Method is a weight loss program that actually will work for you. And I I wanna offer this to you from the framework of now that you have listened to this podcast and really understood what was missing, it will really help you make sure that the five o method works for you. The truth of it is, at its heart, the five o method is very prescriptive things to do, which can still fall short If you aren't really truly manipulating it and making it work for you, You can do all the things, but understanding why you're doing them and why the things that you've done in the past didn't work to me is the secret sauce. This podcast is the secret sauce that can help you make the Five O Method work for you. And just in case you don't know what the five o method is, it is my free weight loss program for women over 50 that starts with your mindset, then moves to your body, and also gently, lovingly supports your metabolism while you're doing things. You can find it, by the way, from my website, If if you are gonna go find the transcript, you can also find the five o method there. And here's the thing about making the Five O Method work for you. I, over the course of my weight loss career. Have worked with dozens of women in real life, and, I mean, I'm I'm counting up the dozens in my brain. But honestly, at this point, it thousands of women that I've worked with online. And I have really truly studied what works and what doesn't work. A long time ago, I absolutely fell in the camp of weight loss is a body thing. You just do the things. You put your head down. You knuckle white knuckle through it. You get it done and then you kinda hope for the best. And unsurprisingly, this is what led to me gaining and losing weight half a dozen times in my lifetime. I was only trying to address the body. When I finally started working with not just my own self and being in my own problems. But watching other women, helping other women lose weight, and really noticing the struggles that they were having and the questions that they kept asking me and really refining my message and how I talk to them about, Okay. Well, here's the thing you do. But also in order to do that, here's how you're probably gonna wanna think about it. And also, if that doesn't come naturally to you. Let's find out what you were thinking beforehand about, you know, counting your calories or drinking your water or getting to bed on time or getting up the same time every morning or exercising moderately. Like, let's figure out what you were already thinking, and then here's this thing that That works for me. Here's how I think. And then from those 2 things, let's make you do the things that you need to do. By refining that process, Again, with dozens and then hundreds and now thousands of women, I can confidently come to you and tell you that the five o method works. It addresses your brain. It addresses your body. It helps you help them work together. Your brain and your body are always working together whether you notice it or not. So knowing what's been missing from your other programs and knowing what works in the five o method is how you, my friend, are going to be able to lose weight for the last time. You, my friend, are gonna lose all the weight you want and keep it off forever. Because now you know. You address the disbeliefs. You create habits that are sustainable over time and you intentionally create belief. Here's Here's how the five o method does that. My friend, it addresses your disbeliefs with daily journaling. Yes. That really is the secret to figuring out what is currently in your brain. The Vivo method actually suggests that you eat the foods that you already know and love in ways that you already eat them, but in portion sizes that meet your calorie target. And then it also really gently, lovingly encourages you to take a look at what you're doing as a win, even when it feels like a struggle, even when it feels like it's a slog, even when it feels like this might be one of those programs that isn't gonna work. It encourages you to create belief in yourself and your weight loss. This is how you can make your program work for you, my friend. I really, really hope that this one was helpful for you today. Thank you so much for listening. In spite of my raspy voice and my snotty nose I love. I will talk to you again soon. Hey. Thanks for listening all the way to the end of the podcast. My friend, there's no better time to lose weight, and there's no better way to do it than with the five o method, my free weight loss mindset guide for women over 50. It's simple, sustainable, and backed by science. We start with your mindset because your body only goes where your brain goes first. This is the thing that's been missing from all those other weight loss programs you've tried. Download your free copy today at

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Originally aired January 4, 2024
Wanna know why your last weight loss program didn’t work? The short answer is this: they were only trying to change your body. But my friend, weight loss only finishes in your body. It starts in your brain. So, if you want to ditch the programs that don’t work, and lose weight for the last time, you gotta know what’s been missing from those other plans. Which is exactly what we’re talking about today.

Meet Your Host

Mindset expert and certified life coach Pahla B knows a thing or two about changing your mind to change your weight and your life. She’s the creator of The 5-0 Method, Amazon-best selling author of the book “Mind Over Menopause,” and former yo-yo dieter who has cracked the code on lifelong weight maintenance. Join Pahla B each week for the personal insights, transformative mindset shifts, and science-backed body advice that can help you lose all the weight you want and keep it off forever.